Confidentially Yours - Avi and Adele

Confidentially Yours: Ready for your close-up? Tips on dating profile photos

Dear Avi and Adele: 

How can I select the best photos for my online profile on

Cute Punim

Dear Cute Punim:

All the online dating sites will tell you that photo quality impacts the responses that you get, and we have to agree. Here are a few easy steps you can take to get the best possible outcome from your profile.

  1. Choose a close-up, cropped headshot for your primary photo. You should be the only subject in the photo, and it should be a flattering, everyday, recent photo.
  2. When choosing a photo that has more than just you in it, clearly identify yourself or crop it down. Girls hate trying to determine which guy matches the profile when looking at a photo of five tall-dark-and-menschy guys (and she’s more likely to ask you who your cute friend is); guys hate learning that the other hot woman in the photo turns out to be your mamele.
  3. Consider how the photo reflects your personality. If you only went to one concert in the past five years, and you choose a dolled-up concert photo, ask yourself if it accurately portrays your personality. Halloween costumes, photos with your 10 cats, and shots of you doing shots of Manishevitz are generally advised against.
  4. In the same line, consider your expression in the photos. Guys seem compelled to post “tough guy” photos, which many girls see as the “Sleeping with the Enemy” expression. Girls like to either show their bookish or their party girl side with their hair and clothing, which guys see as well, either librarian or party girl.
  5. Do not post pictures of your pet, you with your pet, you with friends who did not give you permission to be in their photos, your friends’ children or your own, or your car. If we had to explain why, you need more help than we can offer.

Best of luck on digital dating. Honesty in photography is truly the best policy.

Livin’ and Lovin’,

Avi and Adele